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08/09/2001
"I am SO connected...."
Well, my broadband's a hummin' away. Incredible how fast it is.. I downloaded an application from, umm, a major security software vendor today. Normally, the download probably would have taken 20 minutes or so; the download completed in just over a minute. FAB-ulous!
Just after 9 AM, the knock on the door I've been waiting for. I swear, cable companies must use the same hiring pool as the big brown parcel service. Mr. Cable was some kinda SNACKY. Burly, furry-chested, dark complexion, moustache...no wedding ring.
I purposely kept myself out of the way, so CableBear wouldn't see me staring or drooling. He basically had to do some work on the pole outside (removing some sort of shield), then he replaced the service cable entering my house, so he was up and down his big ladder several times. I called Mark and quietly PLOTZED over the phone. Mark laughed as we started to try to think up scenarios where I could at least get a good grope going...
It was terribly hot, so I offered him chilled bottled water. He politely declined, indicating he had a good supply in his truck. When He came back in the basement after stringing the cables, I felt practically faint as the smell of humid "bear" (mixed with a faint whiff of deodorant or cologne) hit my nostrils.
He came back upstairs, checked the signal meter, murmuring "oh, yeah, much better now", and showed me the difference in the reading. "You'll fly on there now." he said. Sure enough, the modem came on and immediately started communicating.
He quickly ran over the software settings with me, verifying that what I'd already done was correct. He made sure that I could log on successfully, asked me if I needed help setting up mail or anything. I assured him I'd be fine, thanked him for getting me connected in this heat, shook his hand and walked him to the door.
Typical techno - queen dilemma: despite the fact that CableBear got me all hot, in my head I was debating between touching myself and plunging into broadband heaven. Broadband won out.. how sad is that?
